Wednesday, May 21, 2008


Took Zozer to the church picnic tonight, or "Carnival!" as she calls it. She was very excited to go, and M was excited because he was absolutely sure she was finally big enough to go on some kiddy rides. He's eager to start training his next Roller Coaster Partner, since this one has grown wise as she ages and has determined that amusement park and carnival rides are brightly colored whirling death traps of evil and All That Is Bad and Disgusting.

So we went and Daddy bought some ride tickets and we figured out which rides were appropriate for a child who is only 2.75 years old. (This is where Mommy rolls her eyes and Daddy grins maniacally.)

Turns out the cars were one, and we figured they were probably the tamest of the group, and so we headed that way.

We watched one spin and of the ride and asked Zoe which car she'd like to drive. "The bus!" She was emphatic. Okaaaaay. Some jackass had stuck letter labels on the front that spelled "Special Bus." Great. Our child's first carnival ride is on the Special Bus. Or SPECIA BS as it actually spelled since some of the letters were missing. Zoe didn't seem to mind.

She grinned and laughed for most of the ride, and then the last three turns the lower lip came out and started quivering. Uh oh. M and I shot looks at each other...what do we do now? Can't ask the operator to stop the ride...there are other kids who are on there! Shit! Thankfully she made it through okay and M raced in and pulled her from the specia bs. "What's wrong?" We figured she got totally freaked or something. "Want to ride in red car!" Ah. She had simply realized the specia bs wasn't so special after all.

After that, though, she was actually content to just watch the cars go 'round. Fine by us. Cheaper that way.

M said, "Hey, let's try her out in the flying spaceships." Okay, cool. Still a deathtrap, but on a smaller, cute scale, so okay. While in line M asked the operator if one of us could ride with her. Nope. Okay. Plan B. Mommy arranged a deal with the nice people behind us for their little girl, Mary, to ride with Zozer. Figured she'd do better with a pal. Zoe had already chosen the pink spaceship (of course), and Mary was cool with that, so we were good. Or so we thought.
Step 1: Place child in spaceship.
Step 2: Other people place their child in spaceship.
Step 3: Snap pictures.
Step 4: Hear your child say, "Want down! Want down!"
Step 5: Retrieve your child from spaceship and apologize to other child's family.
Step 6: Sheepishly get ride tickets back from scowling operator.

We decided perhaps the giant slide was a little more benign, so off Daddy went, carrying Zozer and a black mat of questionable origin up about 400 stairs. His parting words, "Whatever she says up there, we're coming down only one way!"

Turns out she loved the slide and was quite pleased with her ride down.

Took advantage of some other fun things at the carnival, like the cut-out-face photo opportunity, and the Duck Pond, where "everyone wins a prize!" Oh, great. More crap for the house.
And win she did! A spiky pink (of course) ball that she was so pleased with she requested that she be allowed to sleep with it. Answer: no. Compromise: leave it on nightstand where it's in full view and where Mommy and Daddy have been instructed to leave it all night so it will be there in the morning when Zozer wakes up. Deal.

Grandpa Ray also won her a stuffed lion, but the dang sun was setting at that point and the shots are so blown out on one side that even I couldn't salvage them in Photoshop. As it is, I'm not pleased with the quality I'm posting here, but alas, they're the only images I made today and I figured I better throw a bone to the Zoe picture-lovers out there.


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