Thursday, December 27, 2007

A veritable potpourri of nothing

It's Big Trip Eve.

Which is, of course, The Night Before We Go Out Of Town. Or, The Night Amy Tries To Fix/Clean Everything in the House.

You know, because packing isn't enough.

I have this thing stuck in my brain that my house must be perfect before I leave to go out of town. Because I might get hit by a bus in Cincinnati and then people would have to go through my house and the last thing I want them thinking is, "Poor Amy, she died, but man, was she a slob."

Yes, I realize this is a totally irrational thought on my part. Add it to the list.

So, on top of packing, I'll be doing unnecessary laundry (and folding and putting it away), emptying the trash cans, straightening my desk, changing the sheets on the bed, organizing the linen closet, cleaning out the fridge. I'll clean out the closet (actually, closets, since most of them need it), and the medicine cabinet, and the cabinet under the kitchen sink.

All for a trip that starts Friday morning and ends sometime Sunday.

Imagine how I'd be if I were leaving for a week.

On a good note, I got my fingers and toes done today so they look good for Saturday's wedding.

Which reminds me...everyone think happy thoughts for Paul and Alison who will be united in holy matrimony at 4 p.m. Saturday. Paul is the first cousin in M's family to get married after M, who was the first of them all. It's been 10 friggin' years, and three of 'em are getting married within a year. It's about damn time. Welcome to The's fantastic!

I had to take pains to write "Paul and Alison" instead of "Alison and Paul," because a conversation with M earlier today went something like this:

A: blah blah blah...Alison and Paul's wedding...
M: You got that backwards.
A: What?
M: Alison and Paul. It should be Paul and Alison.
A: Whatever, hoser. Hey, guess what, we can vote now, too!

M has this thing where he thinks, rather provincially I believe, that the man should always be listed first, and that the woman must take the man's name.

To which I reply, "phooey."

1. I say, and I think other people say, "Mike and Amy" (when referring to myself in the third person, as I am wont to do) only because it sounds better to have the one-syllable name come before the two-syllable name. I'm big on syllabic harmonics. If the syllables were reversed, for instance, if we were named Anne and Justin, well, then I'd come first. I bow to his greater syllabic simplicity, so to speak. I'm trying to think of people in our family for whom this works, but I'll be damned if the men aren't all one syllables while the women are two: Shawn and Katie, Fred and Sandy, Jim and Margaret, Mike and Carol, Rob and Shelley, Ray and Judy. Doug and Tiffany. Grrrr.

Addendum to 1.: If both names are of equal syllables, then you just go with what you want. Marty and Megan sounds just as fine as Megan and Marty. Michelle and Ryan or Ryan and Michelle...take your pick.

2. I say that the woman can take whatever damn name she well pleases, and he's lucky I didn't pick something out of thin air, like "Mochaccino" or "Pickle." I chose his last name because I happen to like it. It means "golden," by the way. How cool is that? I have no idea what my maiden name means in Polish, but I've heard enough Polack jokes to last a lifetime and so was not too upset to change to Golden.

Huh. I just googled "Polish slur" to ensure that I had spelled "Polack" correctly (I had), and I found this. The Internet is a just a beehive of information, ain't it?!

This is the way my brain works on Big Trip Eve. I just sorta bounce from one thing to the next with no apparent plan.

Which is why, halfway to Cincy tomorrow, I shall scream, "I forgot the ______!"


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