Guest Blogger: M, with thoughts about his grandma
Today's post is courtesy of M. He wrote so beautifully of his grandmother that I wanted to share it with everyone who wasn't able to hear him deliver his memorial at her funeral mass. With his permission, I present to you his loving tribute.
Antonette Swearingen was born into this world to Clement and Mary Daddona on February 7, 1918. She spent many years living in Dog Town, near the old Deaconess Hospital, in a couple of two-story flats on Tamm Avenue. She was 11 years old the day the stock market crashed on October 29, 1929, an event that in some ways would shape Ann’s remaining 81 years with us. She married Carl on June 5, 1938 and supported the household when Uncle Sam called him into service for World War II.
She often told the story about Carl’s return from the war and how she walked right past her beloved husband. You see, in the midst of their time apart, his hair had turned snow white. I do not remember if Carl had a side to this story, but if the roles were reversed and he would not have recognized her, I imagine she might have given him an ear full.
When I looked up the term spirited in a dictionary, I found the phrase, "having or showing mettle, courage, vigor, liveliness.” Ann was certainly all of these. While Carl had his hands full with Ann, little did they know that both of their plates were going to get just a bit fuller in the coming years. On January 31, 1949, their beloved Carol Ann was born.
In 1952, Ann became a charter member of St. Clement Church, a devout catholic for her entire life and rarely missing the Sunday collection. In fact, I understand that in lean times where money was tighter than usual, Ann never lost track, playing catch-up later when times were a bit easier. When I looked up the term generosity in a dictionary, I found a one-word antonym that is absolutely perfect in every way, "stinginess," because when it came to family, friends, and her catholic faith, Ann was anything but stingy. Now, if we are talking about the US Government and anything close to some form of a tax, Ann was Mrs. Stingy with a capital S and she was profoundly open about her financial dealings.
Over the years, Carl sometimes worked the night shift at McDonnell Douglas, while Carol attended grade school at St. Clement and continued her studies at Ursuline Academy for high school. Ann kept the household in order, with healthy servings of lasagna and the widest variety of Christmas cookies anyone could want. On one evening, Carol arrived home from her shift at Robert Hall with a guy in tow. His name was Michael and I think we all know how that relationship has turned out…40 years of marriage and going strong. Ann and Michael had many discussions since then, with Michael throwing his arms up in most cases, figuring that although he proved his point, Ann’s stubborn behavior would not let her see his side of the story. When I looked up the term stubborn in a dictionary, the phrase “unreasonably obstinate” was the first entry and I think this might be one of her most memorable qualities. Right or wrong, she rarely backed down from her stance, holding her ground against numerous lawn service personnel, window cleaning companies, and her most favorite adversaries, the US Government and the pesky IRS.
Ann was an avid bowler, volunteering for her league in many roles, including Vice-President, President, and of course, Treasurer. Imagine that, Ann was involved with money even outside her family life. She also volunteered in her later years for the Women’s Auxiliary at the Salvation Army, crocheting afghans and other trinkets that were sold at the annual boutique prior to the holidays. As arthritis limited the motion of her hands and failing eyesight reduced her vision, Ann’s dedication was, as the dictionary describes it, “whole and earnest." Using a walker to get around, Ann made the weekly trip, bumming rides off anyone and delivering her previous week’s work for inclusion in the up-and-coming sale.
Wow, what a strong soul, I guess you have to be if you are 91 years old and still living alone at home. Up until the very end, Ann was scrimping and saving every penny she could, clipping coupons, and fighting the taxman each step of the way. In the unpredictable world we live in, Ann was tried and true in every facet of daily life. In 1995, Ann and the rest of us lost Carl, the love of her life…she was never the same without him, but she maintained her independent way of thinking. While you might not have agreed with her position on one subject or another, or maybe all of them, I found her consistency a refreshing trait. Even as one grandson lit the legs of her dining room table on fire and countless teasing incidents led to many fights, Ann punished both grandsons no matter who was at fault…every time without fail!
As we say our final goodbyes to Ann, a spirited, generous, stubborn, dedicated, and strong soul, let us remember that we are much better off having known her as our mom, grandma, great-grandma, aunt and friend. As a wise man once said, “God has to deal with her now." I think He has His work cut out for Him, because, as we all know, Ann was a firecracker who followed no rules, listened to few, but nonetheless, had a heart of gold.
Antonette Swearingen was born into this world to Clement and Mary Daddona on February 7, 1918. She spent many years living in Dog Town, near the old Deaconess Hospital, in a couple of two-story flats on Tamm Avenue. She was 11 years old the day the stock market crashed on October 29, 1929, an event that in some ways would shape Ann’s remaining 81 years with us. She married Carl on June 5, 1938 and supported the household when Uncle Sam called him into service for World War II.She often told the story about Carl’s return from the war and how she walked right past her beloved husband. You see, in the midst of their time apart, his hair had turned snow white. I do not remember if Carl had a side to this story, but if the roles were reversed and he would not have recognized her, I imagine she might have given him an ear full.
When I looked up the term spirited in a dictionary, I found the phrase, "having or showing mettle, courage, vigor, liveliness.” Ann was certainly all of these. While Carl had his hands full with Ann, little did they know that both of their plates were going to get just a bit fuller in the coming years. On January 31, 1949, their beloved Carol Ann was born.
In 1952, Ann became a charter member of St. Clement Church, a devout catholic for her entire life and rarely missing the Sunday collection. In fact, I understand that in lean times where money was tighter than usual, Ann never lost track, playing catch-up later when times were a bit easier. When I looked up the term generosity in a dictionary, I found a one-word antonym that is absolutely perfect in every way, "stinginess," because when it came to family, friends, and her catholic faith, Ann was anything but stingy. Now, if we are talking about the US Government and anything close to some form of a tax, Ann was Mrs. Stingy with a capital S and she was profoundly open about her financial dealings.
Over the years, Carl sometimes worked the night shift at McDonnell Douglas, while Carol attended grade school at St. Clement and continued her studies at Ursuline Academy for high school. Ann kept the household in order, with healthy servings of lasagna and the widest variety of Christmas cookies anyone could want. On one evening, Carol arrived home from her shift at Robert Hall with a guy in tow. His name was Michael and I think we all know how that relationship has turned out…40 years of marriage and going strong. Ann and Michael had many discussions since then, with Michael throwing his arms up in most cases, figuring that although he proved his point, Ann’s stubborn behavior would not let her see his side of the story. When I looked up the term stubborn in a dictionary, the phrase “unreasonably obstinate” was the first entry and I think this might be one of her most memorable qualities. Right or wrong, she rarely backed down from her stance, holding her ground against numerous lawn service personnel, window cleaning companies, and her most favorite adversaries, the US Government and the pesky IRS.
Ann was an avid bowler, volunteering for her league in many roles, including Vice-President, President, and of course, Treasurer. Imagine that, Ann was involved with money even outside her family life. She also volunteered in her later years for the Women’s Auxiliary at the Salvation Army, crocheting afghans and other trinkets that were sold at the annual boutique prior to the holidays. As arthritis limited the motion of her hands and failing eyesight reduced her vision, Ann’s dedication was, as the dictionary describes it, “whole and earnest." Using a walker to get around, Ann made the weekly trip, bumming rides off anyone and delivering her previous week’s work for inclusion in the up-and-coming sale.
Wow, what a strong soul, I guess you have to be if you are 91 years old and still living alone at home. Up until the very end, Ann was scrimping and saving every penny she could, clipping coupons, and fighting the taxman each step of the way. In the unpredictable world we live in, Ann was tried and true in every facet of daily life. In 1995, Ann and the rest of us lost Carl, the love of her life…she was never the same without him, but she maintained her independent way of thinking. While you might not have agreed with her position on one subject or another, or maybe all of them, I found her consistency a refreshing trait. Even as one grandson lit the legs of her dining room table on fire and countless teasing incidents led to many fights, Ann punished both grandsons no matter who was at fault…every time without fail!
As we say our final goodbyes to Ann, a spirited, generous, stubborn, dedicated, and strong soul, let us remember that we are much better off having known her as our mom, grandma, great-grandma, aunt and friend. As a wise man once said, “God has to deal with her now." I think He has His work cut out for Him, because, as we all know, Ann was a firecracker who followed no rules, listened to few, but nonetheless, had a heart of gold.
posted by Amy at 9:00 PM
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